Except for the fun that kids have exchanging cards, Valentine's Day can be pretty obnoxious. We are accosted with ads for everything from roses to pajamas. We feel obligated to buy our beloveds something unique and special to show them that we really do care and have not lost that lovin' feeling. It's also the day that, if you are single and genuinely interested in someone, you have to pretend not be until the Hallmark holiday passes. Starting anything slightly romantic before Valentine's Day can be pretty awkward.
Whether single, hooked up, happily married, or happily divorced (raising hand), we all need to remember to practice a little Self Love, as well.
Self Love doesn't mean pulling a Stuart Smalley, staring into the mirror and telling yourself that you're good enough, smart enough, and gosh darn it, people like you. It's also not preening around allowing people to adore you. I mean honestly loving and caring for yourself so that those around you may feel the benefits of a healthy person that is on fire and passionate about whatever it is you do or say.
Healthy Self Love is about honoring your dreams and the purpose for your being on this planet. Sometimes, we lose that lovin feeling towards ourself and start down a path of self absorption. Self absorption can be a defense mechanism (arrogance and puffed up pride) or, it can be the sadder kind... the destroyer of dreams. You might perceive unachieved goals as failures rather than lessons on the journey. If left unchecked, this maddening place of woe-is-me might take hold of you and your better days, steering you further and further off course.
Don't let that happen!
Whenever you start to feel that spiraling negativity and you are thinking too much about yourself and not how you and your talents can best serve others around you, stop for a minute. What is it that put you in that place? Was it criticism received from someone that doesn't have your best interest at heart? Was it someone close to you that let you down? Was it something you ate?
Self love is also keeping yourself safe and well-balanced.
Stay away from dream stealers. Don't spend too much time around people that take away your smile. In fact, consider why they are in your life and wheter you need to be around them at all. If those people happen to be related to you, you still have to see them, but manage that time with them. Know your limits.
Eat better and exercise. It's not a crime to enjoy a piece of cake or sleep in. Just remember that there is a healthy old 80 year old inside that wants to walk around in the sun and enjoy time with loved ones. Make sure you take care of that old guy or gal that you will one day be by not overindulging now.
Indulge in quiet time. Being alone with yourself can be scary sometimes. All those thoughts that you keep yourself busy with can drown out the deeper thoughts that need to come to the surface. Find a place that you like to walk, or sit at, or stare at the stars... whatever, wherever... just find that time to be still. You'll be amazed at the things you didn't know you were thinking.
So take care of yourself. Give yourself some love and encouragement. The world is a better place when you are living passionately and on purpose!!
Happy Valentine's Day!