Muppet Psychology

Sometimes, I get bored. Even when I'm ridiculously busy, I find myself slipping into avoidance behavior and playing bored rather than doing the work I should be doing. Sometimes, when I'm avoiding deadlines and laundry and email, my mind wanders. Random thoughts pop into my head. For instance:

If I was a Muppet, which Muppet would I be?

Yes. I really do ask myself these deep, meaningful questions. You think that's nutty? Try living in my head!!

So, then I wanted to know the same of my friends on Twitter. Apparently, I'm not the only one that likes to think random thoughts when avoiding actual work. I wonder if I'm the only one that starts singing "Seems I'm not alone in being alone" from Police's Message in a Bottle whenever these moments happen...


I started to see a pattern in the replies. Certain personalities were gravitating towards the same Muppets. So my random question had all of a sudden turned into a study in sociology or psychology or any other -ology that made all the hours I spent pondering these responses a worthy expenditure of my time.

Now what?

Well, because I'm a geek that is really way too into how people tick, I'm going to attempt to translate the choice of characters into some sort of meaningful meanings. Because I'm really into this now. Like, Margaret-Freaking-Mead into it.

Kermit the Frog

Kind. Quietly charming. Intelligent. Slow to anger. Cool under pressure. Green. And let's not forget his mad banjo skills. Everything you want in a Frog! Choosing Kermit as your Muppet doppelgänger could mean that you are a pretty cool, sane, organized person to hang with. Just please... spare us the banjo, 'kay?

People who chose Kermit:

Miss Piggy

Large and in charge... THE Diva to be reckoned with! Persuasive to the point of manipulation, but not quite. She doesn't need to manipulate when she's got all that... ummm... CHARISMA! If you chose Miss Piggy, you LOVE the spotlight and like to have things your way. You have an aesthetic that says... nay, screams, "Look at me, but not too long you creepy dude in the corner!"

People who chose Miss Piggy:

Fozzy Bear

You think you're funny. You really want to be funny. But some times, you might try too hard (as evidenced by the awkward wakka-wakka-wakka-insert-crickets-here moments), and you come off as corny. You know that and you are totally cool with corny. And that is why everyone loves you. Who couldn't love Fozzie?

I think it's the hat.

People who chose Fozzy:


Easy going, light-hearted, stylish, musically talented, and as someone pointed out, a possible pot head (something about the ubiquitous cloud of smoke). At the very least, Janice is a fun-loving wild child with a Hippie heart. People that chose Janice always seem to be smiling and taking life as it comes. Might be the Xanax.

People who chose Janice:

The Count

As my dear friend Tina (@SendChocolate) pointed out, The Count is OCD. He has to count EVERYTHING! Not counting something would be like being out in the sun. He'd shrivel up and turn to dust... even in Forks! How many people chose The Count? Only one. Love you, Tina!


I LOVE Animal.

So here's what I think about the people that chose Animal. They are all seemingly mellow on the outside, but they have a wildness in their heart. You can see it in their eyes... in their writing... in the things they create. I know I'm reading too much into this. But then again, maybe not.

At first, I thought that's the Muppet I would choose for myself. But I think I'd prefer dating Animal. You know... if I was Janice. I always did have a thing for wild and crazy drummers.

People who chose Animal:

Statler and Waldorf

aka: The Two Old Guys in the Theater

They remind me a little of Randolph and Mortimer Duke. What do you think?

They're haughty, snobby, self-righteous, critical, and have seemingly no empathy for other humans... or Muppets. But I could never get enough of either of these duos. There's something delightful in watching them be nasty.

What does choosing them say about a person? They either ARE nasty and mean... or they just wish they could let out the snarky, witty, biting remarks when someone absolutely deserves that full can of whoop ass.

Only one person chose The Old Guys: @PaulBoutin. He recently tweeted a link to this Op Ed in the NY Times by T.M. Shine about being unemployed. Pure awesome. Or as he put it, "tragically marvelous." Although I think I'd annoy him, I totally want to hang out with Paul Boutin now.

Note to Paul: I'll try not to say "totally" and "awesome" too much.


Misunderstood, awkward, googley-eyed, meeping, lovable nerd. Used and abused by The Professor. If Beaker isn't losing a limb or exploding, he's being tested to some other limits, such as much caffeine is too much caffeine. At some point, you'd think Beaker would just quit!

So what does that say about you if you chose Beaker?

I'm gonna leave that to the one person that actually chose Beaker: @madatmama

The Yip Yips

Okay... this is what I used to do whenever I would answer a question in the affirmative. Drove my grandmother NUTS!!!

If you identify with a Yip Yip, you are probably very inquisitive, eager to learn new things, an explorer type... or just downright irritating to a grandmother who thinks you are trying to get her goat. (And also, I never understood that whole goat thing.)

Thanks @ParentopiaDevra for reminding me of the Yip Yips. Uh huh.

Other Muppet-Like Creatures

One person went outside of the Muppet Show and chose another Jim Henson creation. I can totally see an interview with his mom: "He always did like to play outside the sand box."

Yoda was chosen by @Jesse. And as @JosephRooks said, "Yoda is totally a Muppet. You just never see him on Sesame Street or The Muppet Show because the commute is ridiculous."

Once again, Twitter proves to me that asking random questions to perfectly wonderful semi-strangers is WAY more interesting than getting my work done.

So... which Muppet would YOU be?